For the past month or so, I have found myself in a deep depression. Not knowing or understanding why, I just let the days pass by, overlooking the build up of lack of self purpose. Until one night I just hit the bottom of the hole that I had fallen into. But the depression took on another shape, anger. I became angry at myself and God.
For the first time in my life I yield at God, blaming Him for His mistake in my life. Asking the questions, “Why did You do this to me?”, “Why aren’t You following through with Your promise?”, and “Why did You leave me here alone?”. You know all the questions one says out of a lack of understanding and anger. But that next morning God pulled me out of the hole and brought me to Romans 2:15, which says, “They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right.”. In context the scripture is saying that we can know right from wrong whether we’ve heard Gods law or not because it is written on our hearts. But for me, it was saying something completely different.
You see God gave us the law because He love us. So that we can do right and encourage others to do the same. So when God says His law is written on my heart. I hear that Gods love is written on my heart. Because He would not give law without love. Leading me to this point, no matter how lost I feel or empty I think I am inside, I can hold tightly to the knowledge that God’s love is inscribed on my heart and that’s something no one or thing can take from me.